FYI

**FYI: A few friends and family members have pointed out that my google reader wasn't working properly on my new blog. I can't seem to figure out why it's not working, but will let you know when it is!**

P.S. Okay...it might be working now. :)

Clarification

My sister pointed out that she didn't think my last post was entirely clear. She says that I should've made my new blog address into an actual link you could click on, and changed the header on this blog back from 'on call mom'.

So, just to be clear. My goal is to post weekly on the new site: www.oncallmom.com. That blog will remain open to anyone (and, while not anonymous, will have less identifying info.)

This blog will be the one going private, and will ultimately be where I'll probably post more of my kid pictures/random family happenings that I might not want a patient happening upon. Also, I hope you won't be shy in asking for an invite, even if I don't know you well. I know I'm not when people go private!

And we're live...

Okay, so I've decided to go the new blog address route, as discussed below.

Come join me at www.oncallmom.com!

I'm not making any grand goals, here, but I'd like to post weekly. Keep myself thinking and writing, and all that good stuff.

I'm going to keep this blog, but will go private. I'll probably be prone to post more kid related stuff on this one. Email me or comment if you want an invite. I'll probably leave this up for a few months, because unless you're on google reader, it might be a while before you think to check my infrequently updated blog! xoxo

On Call Mom

I've been feeling the need to re-name my blog for a while, now. "Time Exists Just On Your Wrist" was perfect during my residency years. I was working all the time, and sometimes it felt like time was going too fast while at the same time it felt like the training road would never end. Those lyrics from the Travis song ('time exists just on your wrist, so don't panic...moments last and lifetimes are lost in a day') were a helpful reminder. But now? I feel more like an 'On-Call Mom'. A)We moms are always on call for our kids, right? B)Though I'm not taking nighttime call like I did as a resident, my doctor self is always on-call my my patients, my kids, and my friends/family.

I turned to the very talented Ashly of kidlark (kidlark.blogspot.com) to design a new header that reflected this, and she did a fabulous job!


Pretty fancy. I really like it.

So....do you think I'll actually blog now? ;)

P.S. I'm still undecided on whether I'll transfer my blog to a new one (I have to think about what I want public if a patient were to find my blog) or keep blogging here. Decisions will be forthcoming. :)

Of Conga Lines and Kids

Chris and I were fairly laid back about our wedding planning. And by 'we', I mean 'me', because is any guy high maintenance about wedding planning?

Which is not to say that I wasn't involved or didn't care. I did. But I didn't stress about it. I just thought it was the best kind of fun to look at flowers and try on pretty dresses and eat lots of sampler plates of delicious food. So when the florist delivered the wrong boutonnieres for the men? I didn't even notice. Apparently the bride at the other wedding really, really did.

There was, however, one thing we did both feel strongly about, and we made it clear to our DJ:

There is to be NO Conga line at the wedding.

I don't know why we felt like this except that it seemed to evoke cheesy weddings from an 80's episode of 'America's Funniest Home Video's. And not that we're particularly high-brow, but, you know...you've got to draw the line somewhere.

Flash-forward to now: E has become enamored of our wedding video. When she has screen time, she wants the wedding video and nothing else. Specifically, the parts with 'wild dancing'.

And in watching the 'wild dancing', I have had occassion to re-live--on a daily basis--our Conga line. Yep, you heard me: we had a Conga line.

Chris's Aunt Pam, who is the type of person who is so fabulously fun, and who you love so much that they can get away with anything, got into the DJ's good graces. And then she convinced him that we weren't really serious about that whole 'no conga line' thing. And then suddenly there was a line of people dancing around the room to the lyrics, 'I'm hot! You're hot!

Oh, yes. It was glorious.

And you know what's funny? That Conga line is my favorite part of the video. As it was one of my favorite parts of the reception. Because everyone was smiling and laughing and embodying 'wild abandon.' Because even my mom was throwing her arms up in the air like she just didn't care. Because we were all doing it together.

And it makes me laugh every single time we watch. The thing I was sure I didn't want, is my very favorite memory of all.

Sometimes I think parenting is like that. I wake up in the morning and I think, "NO conga lines!" You know, I have my list of things we should do and when we should do them. Of laundry to be folded and emails to be sent and errands to be run.

But then the kiddos get themselves in the good graces of life's DJ, and suddenly it's time to dance or get off the floor.

And when I dance...when I just follow the moment and forget my plans: put down my phone and pay attention to a make-believe ball, skip the planned bookstore trip and laugh at the afternoon melty's (a more palatable descriptive term than meltdowns), or put down my book and read to them some of theirs...we make the best memories of all.

When I look back at each day, I'm always happiest when I've let a little Conga line in:a little messy, a lot of flexible, and an extra helping of feeling happy to just be together.

So now, when my life starts to get a little crazy, I close my eyes and think, "I'm hot. You're hot." And with a bounce in my step, I go on my way, knowing that these are the moments I'll probably end up treasuring the most.
*****

Afternoon melty's? What afternoon melty's?

Me and You

Chris and I celebrated five years of marriage earlier this year. It is a milestone, some would say, and it has caused me to reflect on what marriage means to me. I found my answer on my iPhone (no, really!)


I was looking for something from one of our text messages, and ended up scrolling through the long stream of messages we’ve sent back and forth since we got these great little devices over a year ago.

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“Good news on jon. Call me when you get a chance.”
****
“Did you say you wrote a thank you note to Mary including Eva’s gift?”
****
“There is no way I can survive this day.” (that would be me. I’m prone to dramatics. And it was a work day, not an at home day.)
“Praying for you.”
****
“Do you want me to park the car?”
“No, I’ve got it.”
****
“Love you tons!!!”
“You too!”
****
“Have to leave by 10:20. Need help.”
****
“On the plane. Love you!”
---------------------------------------------

And suddenly it seemed so clear: how two lives are one. How the beauty of our forever-ness is tied up in the the little snippets of back and forth, of scheduling concerns, and of words of encouragement. I saw what’s so beautiful about marriage in those conversation bubbles.

It is a dance, a balancing act, a safe haven. It is a place where we put both of our concerns and desires on the table, and try to make them merge. It is a partnership that asks both of us to help each other out, to have each others backs, and to express love.

Sure, love is in the weekend getaways, the romance, and in the grand gesture gifts.
But deeper love is in the “can you pick up probiotics on the way home? And I love you.”

I love my husband deeply, and I still take such pleasure in the flowers, the little blue boxes and the special dates.
But its the dailiness, the constancy and the quiet partnership we have that fills my soul to the brim.

It's in the way he knows when to bring home frozen custard because I'm having a bad day. It's in the way he adds extra salt to recipes because he knows I'm crazy like that, and the way he takes care of me when I'm sick. It's in the fact that he gets up with our toddler in the mornings so I can keep sleeping, and that I get the baby to fall asleep when I know he's exhausted. It's in him always bringing E to the hospital when I was on call so that I never missed a bedtime. It's in the standing together during those grueling training years and the pillow-talk discussions of new routines to meet changing circumstances. It's in the lunchtime phone calls and the 'what do we have on Saturday again'? It's the 'we'. It's the 'us'.

That’s something my tragically romantic 13 year self would never have believed:
That the best things in life are often the deeper comforts, not the grander excitements.
Or that the first is what often leads to the second.

I’m grateful for marriage. I’m grateful to understand why it matters so much. And I’m grateful that I have the opportunity to walk through this crazy world with someone who makes it such a peaceable walk. And who thinks I’m worth the 0.20 cents/text. (Now that’s romance…and get a texting plan, dear!)

My partner in crime:


Still crazy, after all these years:

Related Blogs

You might remember my sister from this post. She is wonderful, beautiful, smart and talented, and having her close by is a big part of why my life is so great. She has also, historically speaking, been a VERY bad blogger. Not bad with respect to content. Bad with respect to frequency. You think I'm bad? Ha! So, those us who know her, rejoiced when she finally decided to be more regular about this blogging thing. And I am loving it ! She has always been one of those moms who makes me excited to have more kids. Because even when things are crazy (she too has moments where she'd like to put her kids on craigslist...I kid!), I know she would never choose to be doing anything else. She loves being a mom and understands what a privilege it is to raise up little ones And, it must be said, she is an exceptional Aunt. She fawns so much over my kiddos, you'd think they were hers! Bless her. So I'm glad she's chronicling more of her journey through life and motherhood. I hope you'll enjoy it as much as I am!

Sister Extraordinaire:


Now, in case you've missed the button to your right, my sister-in-law, Caitlin (who you might remember from this post), has the most fantastic design blog. She has quite a following, with good reason. She is (you will see a theme developing here) gorgeous, intelligent, talented and kind. I love her like a sister, so maybe I should just drop the 'in-law'? You might see a blog like hers and think that surely that someone living such an exotic, well-designed life couldn't be down-to-earth, approachable, and self-effacing. You would be wrong. She is just as fabulous, good and kind as one could ever wish, and the total opposite of snobby. I eat up all her fabulous designs and am so grateful that she never minds advising me on paint colors, tile backsplashes and the like!

Sister-in-law Extraordinaire:


Did I win the lottery with these two, or what?

A final thought before I head poolside:

I was in the car the other day, on the phone with my sister(Chris was driving...I really am committed to this no cell phone while driving thing). The little ones were asleep in their carseats. Mary asked, "Why are you whispering?" "Oh," I said, "my kids are asleep."

Cue lightning bolt. Or did the earth shake? Not sure, but what's that I just said? My KIDS are asleep. Kids. Plural! I have KIDS. Oh, what a delicious moment.

My kids.

No phrase has ever fit so comfortably on my shoulders. My sister was right: having two kids is definitely more fun. :)

When things get crazy, we just shuffle step our way through!